Mark! (pause, then lose mind) Hit me over the head. Take Joey’s bat and put me out of my misery! Wait…I’ll turn around. Just do it quick. I wish I was kidding. If I have to have the same discussion, ask for the same things one more time, I’m either going to need Haldol and a tight little white jacket or I swear, I’ll run naked through the neighborhood spraying canned-cheese and screaming, “Let’s go streak through the cul-de-sac! Come on, EVERYONE’S doing it!” And don’t look at me like that, while you inhale, as if it’s my imagination. (mocking) “OH, here we go again.” Don’t even reply. I don’t want to know what you’re thinking. I just want you to REMEMBER what I say and pretend it isn’t trivial to you…..
This is an excerpt/preview. You will be able to download the entire monologue once purchased.
- Written by: Jessie McLaren