Monologues

BLIND DATE

$0.99

FEMALE
COMEDIC
2min
25-55
YEARS OLD

If you said they died on the way over, I believe you. A little anxious, yes. It’s been a while. For you, too? That’s what my sister said. So, Maurice…right, Maury then, if that’s what you prefer to be called. Sure, I drink. Two margaritas and I’m in la-la land. You know a nice Mexican restaurant? All right. Let’s vamoose. What’s the matter, Maury? You forgot your wallet? It’s okay. These things happen. No. I have money. You’ll pay me back when we get to your apartment? I’m not certain if I’m going that far. It’s not a rejection. I find you very attractive. Sure, I kiss on the first date…if you put a plastic bag over your face. I’m kidding, Maury. Of course I’m having fun. In a minute I’m going to dance an Irish jig. Well, anything’s better than standing around holding your shitty dead flowers. Maury, I didn’t mean that. This is what happens when my blood sugar gets real low. No, Maury, no, we haven’t passed the point of no return. We’re near it, but thank God, we haven’t passed it yet…..

This is an excerpt/preview. You will be able to download the entire monologue once purchased.

  • Written by: Mark Levine

Description

If you said they died on the way over, I believe you. A little anxious, yes. It’s been a while. For you, too? That’s what my sister said. So, Maurice…right, Maury then, if that’s what you prefer to be called. Sure, I drink. Two margaritas and I’m in la-la land. You know a nice Mexican restaurant? All right. Let’s vamoose. What’s the matter, Maury? You forgot your wallet? It’s okay. These things happen. No. I have money. You’ll pay me back when we get to your apartment? I’m not certain if I’m going that far. It’s not a rejection. I find you very attractive. Sure, I kiss on the first date…if you put a plastic bag over your face. I’m kidding, Maury. Of course I’m having fun. In a minute I’m going to dance an Irish jig. Well, anything’s better than standing around holding your shitty dead flowers. Maury, I didn’t mean that. This is what happens when my blood sugar gets real low. No, Maury, no, we haven’t passed the point of no return. We’re near it, but thank God, we haven’t passed it yet…..

This is an excerpt/preview. You will be able to download the entire monologue once purchased.

  • Written by: Mark Levine